~psychokatkiller

I'm supposed to feel sorry for him i suppose. I don't not in the least bit. My first paycheck was spent on a car that got totalled. He bought the same exact car afterwards even after i asked please can we just save for a better car a new one. My friend chaney ended up buying me a lot of things I needed in basic and then in tech school as well. I spent 40 dollars at the very least a month on a paycheck of up to 2300. Oh and when i spent any money past that you better believe my account went negative. I had to buy christmas presents on a military star card which im still paying off so that my family wouldn't get suspicious and ask where is all your money going.

My friend walden helped out with giving me money as well. Whenever people would ask me if i wanted to go anywhere or do anything at sheppard i felt so bad because id have to say if you want me to you'll have to pay for me and I'd spend most of my time at the src because of that. When I was getting sent to sheppard I didn't have money to afford a cab or anything because our account always seemed to go negative. Even without me touching it. I was sick of working for nothing. I was sick of hearing that he didn't want to talk because oh he was sleeping and he was sleeping all the time. Whenever I wanted to say anything like im feeling depressed or any of that crap he'd be like well what do you want me to do about it id just be thinking can't you just fucking listen. Or the favorite I can't talk right now I'm busy watching roseanne.

When I left sheppard my friend walden gave me 60 dollars because he said its better spent on helping me out rather than anything stupid he'd spend it on. He would talk to me when I was depressed about crap and he really did help. I'd be crying because jeff would be a douche and he'd be like I don't know why you put up with it, if you're married to somebody they really shouldn't make you feel this way. When I talked to him about jeff I really couldn't say anything good either because it would just turn into something bad. When I got to brooks I really did keep trying to make things work. I bought that stupid wow account and wireless card and then he couldn't ever wake up to play it even though i did it so we'd have something to do together. Macintosh started getting me to get out of my room since all i did was wait to make a call or hurry to make a call to jeff. And I ended up hanging out with gomez and macintosh and then it turned into gomez and polston and then just hanging out with gomez all the time.

Gomez was nice he payed for me to eat all the time because id always say i don't have the money to eat out with you guys and he'd always say oh you know i got you. We'd go on adventures off base and just look at a bunch of random stores. We ended up buying foam swords one day and pretending to fight with them. Another day we just visited pawn shops and goodwill and had fun making fun of crap. After a while i just ended up going on these long walks talking it was just nice. I didn't really think about calling jeff or any of that stuff since he said he hates talking to me everyday because it supposedly made him just more lonely talking to me. And i gave up because id just get blown off for a tv show like roseanne. Which I actually said to people in the dorms i was like would you guys blow me off for a fucking tv show like roseanne and they were like hell no. I stopped caring after a while. I stopped wanting to say i love you and what I was seeing was that I sold myself short with this marriage.

Because I could get a whole lot better. I was settling. I was settling with just somebody who cared about me and wanted to stick around. I didn't strive for a high standard but settled with the low standard. And I asked for a divorce. If you know the story whatever I didn't do much of anything before i asked for the divorce. Take it or leave it. After I asked he went insane. Within 4 days of having 1200 in the account he spent 1000 dollars and overdrafted 300. My account was negative 300 and he called my first shirt to say I wasn't supporting him. You can only imagine how pissed iI was getting chewed out by the captain about not supporting somebody who just overdrew my account negative 300. My favorite part was when I went into my mypay which he isn't allowed access to at all to find an allotment coming out of my paycheck for 1355 dollars going into his own personal account which i did not set up what so ever. Then a day later all my passwords for everything are fucking changed. I was having a mental breakdown over this shit. I was crying and fucking screaming about how pissed i was. I got my passwords back because the retard forgot about secret questions. And then changed it to something more complex than the easy one it was already.

The threats were amazing. Because of course I didn't work so hard to get where I was. Threatening to talk to my first shirt and he was like i dont care if you get an article 15 and get kicked out of the military and dishonerably discharged. Oh but my favorite part of course was but i love you so much and care about you. Bullshit if he were out to do that I would never be able to find a job anywhere for dishonerable discharge. I was telling my instructor about these issues and all he could say was son of a bitch. I was threatened for money which finance said he is only allowed 200 at minimum for me to be considered supportive. They said hes on his own for the rest of the money he needs. My mom told me that he didnt even pay a bunch of her bills that he was supposed to have payed. All these checks he payed on bills bounced so she ended up having to go there and pay in cash to pay her bills on certain things. 600 dollars or so that he was supposed to pay her. Oh and hearing that when i could barely afford toilet paper and laundry detergent he was just buying up a million pizzas pissed me off too. He said there wasn't any food in the house but corndogs. My mom was like what the hell is he talking about he asked for corndogs i got them there was steak chicken nuggets corndogs and all this other crap she named off. And all he kept telling me was there was nothing to eat in the house which was why he was buying fast food all the time.

I had to delete various people from my friends list and stop talking to them just because I didn't want anything id say or write to get involved with them seeing and them telling him what i wrote starting more dramma then need be. I kept getting threatening text messages from him and threatening calls so I even had to get my cell phone number changed. I got threatening myspace messages and had to block him. I keep getting threatening melodramatic messages and blocking him. I told him if he had anything to say he talks to my family because i dont want to be called a whore or yelled at everytime i pick up a phone. I feel like killing something everytime i hear his voice because its so obnoxious. Begging for money from me. Asking me why I'm not supporting him like I have a penis and he has a vagina. Oh and I love the comments about high school and how he helped me through it. No one person had to take those tests and that was me. The most he did was show me how to take better notes. That was it. He did like 1 homework assignment for me once.

Which doesn't really matter if we're talking about intelligence. 4N0 is one of the highest failure rates for a tech school. Your learning to be a fucking medic within 3 months or 4 and it usually takes a year. theres a 40 percent pass rate. The block for emt you have to memorize 1500 pages within a month and apply it to a test that has questions where everything is right you have to pick the best possible answer. I passed a block test with 25 questions for that emt block on 1500 pages. The only thing i messed up on was registry.

Sure he helped me study during high school but the tech school crap every test i passed was on my own. Ask him what afosh does or what the hell an expanded standard is and see what he says. Ask him what an AFI- 48-125 determines or who determines what PPE is required for a job class. Ask him whos in charge of HAZCOM training. Who is in charge of Hearing Conservation training and train the trainer courses. What is SF 2754 used for and what tab that goes under. Or what the reproductive health program ensures. I'm sure he couldn't give the answers for any of that crap.

But yeah. Jesus christ.